Dear Caokero, the Lord is forgiving. He will help you to cleanse yourself from all unrightousness. The first step is admitting that you have sinned, and ask for forgiveness. (You have done this.) Now it is up to you to decide who you want to be as a person. God will not force you to do anything. I commend you for having made the decision to eliminate this sin from your life. Draw closer to the Lord, and he will strengthen you to withstand the temptations you will face in the future. Look to him on the best way to go about helping your husband heal from this. God will guide you in this. Look to the Bible for answers of how to live your life. God will also be the small voice inside of you, if you lend your ear to him. I pray that the Lord began to work a new way of life, and in you. I pray that you never stray so far away from him again. I pray this in the name of Jesus, Amen!!!