What I can tell you based on my own experiences is, no one can help you but yourself - and God. Over-eating is not going to bring your husband home or make your children happy. Stop punishing yourself and step back and consider the fact that your situation, as bad as you may think it is, could be much, much worse. Then, do something to take care of yourself. Go for a walk everyday, kiss your children, take a bubble bath....I will pray for you too. Good luck.