You have prayed to God to get you back to him. Please pray . Gos knows best. But please read this very carefully. Gos knows what is best for you. Do not force the hand of god against his will. You may not realise now but few years from now you may thank god with all your heart for unanswered prayers which only god knows will protect you.The hand of god works only for your good. To you it may seem right now that its all your life but believe in god and trust in him. Pray and say father, if it is thy will so be it. Please listen very carefully,,,if God wants you to be with him then it will happen. I not God has something better for you or has saved you from something very drastic and sad. If you could only look into the future you will know but that belongs to god. Trust in god and just keepo saying all the time IN THE NAME OF JESUS. It is very powerful and live by his word.