God bless you for reaching out for help! You are in the midst of a lot of tumoil, and depression. I have been right where you are today. It was hard to make it through one hour let alone a day! You yourself hold the key to how depressed, and how long your going to be depressed. It is important that you mourn the loss of your husband in order to completely heal from it. Just try to remember to not let it go on for years, and years! I am not sure if there is a chance that he will come back, or not. I do know that you need to take the time to build yourself back up, whether he comes home, or not! As if he were to come home now, you probably would just suffocate him with guilt of what he did. If he ever feels the guilt, it needs to be because he thought it through, and wants to make it right. If the feelings of guilt come from you, and he's not ready to make ammends, it will just push him farther away from you. Also, many times if the other person see's that you are doing better, and starting to go on with your life, this can sway them to come home. In short, let this be the thing that starts you out on the healing process, and gives you something else to focus on!!!

***Heavenly Father be with this wife who is struggling with raising a family, and despair. Let this prayer site, or other help, be the help that she needs to overcome the things that she needs to. Let her bring all her problems, and fears to you. Let your blood cover her. Help her to see the small benchmarks, and progress in her life. Let her find simple pleasures in life, again. Bring her through this storm, and plant her feet on higher ground!!! I pray this in the name of Jesus, Amen!!!